20 Strangest Gadgets For Your Dog

When pet loving enters the Twilight Zone...

Ever wonder what ever happened the hoverboards and flying cars we were supposed to have by the year 2000? The world’s best minds were far too busy working on other projects... more important projects.... like one of these:

1. Dog-O-Matic Washing Machine is Canine Carwash

 

Seeing that dog owners tend to view their pooches as a part of the family, I have a hard time believing this will fly. Nonetheless, the Dog-O-Matic (real name) is exactly what it sounds like: a washing machine for dogs that costs between $20 and $48 per “rinse”. Designer Romain Jarry claims the dogs actually enjoy the device, but my money is on more than one owner losing an appendage to their pissed off pet pit bull.
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2. The gadget that translates your dog's woofs into words

 

Kind of like a real-life Babel fish for dogs, the Bowlingual Voice translates dog-speak into human–talk. Sort of. It actually detects your dog’s emotional state (anger, anxious, etc.) and gives words to the feeling (‘leave me alone’, ‘I’m sad’, etc.). Unfortunately the manufacturers are limiting release to Japan, so unless you have an Akita – and happen to speak Japanese – you’ll never know what Fido is really thinking as you rub his stomach.
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3. The Pet’s Eye View Camera

 

The Pet’s Eye View Camera is like your girlfriend’s Facebook password - something you’ve always secretly wanted but would never admit. Now you can see exactly what your dog is up to while you’re busy bringing home the bacon bits. Just wrap the gadget around his neck (don’t worry, it’s lightweight) and it’ll take photographs at set intervals throughout the day. Retail price is just shy of $63.
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4. The Canine Twitterer

 

As Red Rover roves through the day, a tag around his neck sends messages to Twitter based on what he’s doing. The messages are pre-recorded (500 in total) but give an interesting perspective on how your canine spends his time when you’re not looking. The advertisements make no mention of what messages are sent during “waste disposal” or “private parts rehydration”.
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5. Soft-Hearted Pillow Pet Urn

 

This collar is genius for when there are no lighters, empty beer bottles, knives, spoons, belt buckles, car keys or chipped teeth around. A little “here doggie doggie” and voila! Instant bottle opener at your disposal.
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6. Humunga Stache Fetch toy for Dogs

 

If you don’t smirk at least a little from the picture itself, then check your pulse. What you don’t see in the pic is the ball that the dog is chewing on (side note: why is every dog enamoured with squishy balls?) that ends up placing the ‘stache slightly in front of his face. If you like to laugh, you can’t lose with this one.
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7. GoDogGo Fetch Machine

 

Let’s be honest: most of us American’s limit our exercise to doing curls with a beer bottle. Who can really be bothered playing fetch with Fido. That’s what makes GoDogGo Fetch so amazing; it automatically lobs tennis balls until your dog collapses with fatigue. Train your dog to fill the bucket by himself and you’re free to veg–out like a true patriot.
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8. The Ultrasonic Barking Dog Deterrent

 

Any time a nearby dog barks, this pseudo birdhouse emits an ultrasonic tone (inaudible to humans) that scares the piss out of him and deters him from barking in the future. Needless to say, this isn’t the gadget to get if you have a watch dog. For $69.95 you can get one of your own.
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9. Garmin Astro Bundle 220 Dog Tracking GPS

 

Those “Dog Lost” flyers are played out, especially considering today’s technology. Take this Garmin Astro Bundle 220 Dog Tracking GPS, for example. Your dog can chase that squirrel halfway to Antarctica and still show up as a blip on the screen. It’s really designed for hunters using blood hounds, but what’s to stop you from strapping one on your poodle for safe measure?
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10. Yuppy Puppy Treat Machine

 

The idea is simple: fill the Yuppy Puppy food and Treat Machine with dog goodies and leave it to him to dispense a treat whenever he feels worthy. All he has to do is bite the bone leaver. Cute idea? Sure. Practical idea? I think not.
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11. Fetch a Bubble – Chicken Scented

 

Personally, I love bubbles and would chase them myself if grown men were allowed to. Since I’m not, I can always use the Gazillion Bubble Machine to live vicariously through my dog. Just pour in bubble solution and hit go... the gadget will do the rest.
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12. LED Dog Tail Communicator

 

The LED Dog Tail Communicator takes some of the mystery out of the wagging tail. The device calculates how quickly the tail is moving and conveys a message based on that tail speed. It’s only a concept, but if James Auger and Jimmy Liozeau have their way we’ll all understand what those blank eyes and drooling mouth can’t tell us.
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13. PetZoom Pet Park Indoor Pet Potty

 

The PetZoom Pet Park is nothing more than a kitty litter box for dogs. Train your dog to do their duty on the artificial grass for those times when you can’t make it home to let her out. And once you muster the courage, you can clean the unit by emptying the underlying collection tray and rubbing down the surface with warm soapy water.
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14. Autolex Pet Pavillion

 

No, this isn’t a twisted joke prop related to “hot dogs”. Instead, it’s kind of a like a puppy spa-in-a-box. Put Fluffy in, adjust the heating and humidity, and let the Autoelex take care of deodorizing her while she reclines in perfect comfort.
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15. Digital Photo Urns

 

Like the name suggests, the photo urn rotates programmed pictures of the lost loved one on a hardwood encased 7” screen. You lay the ashes to rest within the urn. Not a really good device for the grief stricken, but might be nice to have when you’re ready to let go.
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16. PetZen DogTread Motorized Exercise Treadmill

 

I hate walking the dog so the DogTread (manufactured by PetZen) is an absolute godsend. It works just like a regular treadmill, and I never have to get off the couch. Even better if your pooch is wired up late at night and you want to run some of the energy out of him.
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17. Hot Doll, The 1st Sex toy for Dogs

 

For perverted dogs across the country, the hot doll gives your dog something to hump other than your leg/bedpost/refrigerator/wife. French design company Feel Addicted calls it the first dog sex toy and, frankly, I have no problem believing them.. And did I mention you’re advised to “clean the [toy] regularly”?
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18. PetPeek Window

 

This is perfect if your dog is voyeuristic. Or dreams of being an astronaut or a marine biologist one day. Plus it’ll scare the crap out of your annoying next door neighbour. Can be installed into any standard wooden fence.
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19. The Dogbrella

 

For the 90210ers among us, keep your puppy bone dry during a rainstorm with the Dogbrella. The leash runs right through the inverted canopy, keeping your dog in place. While you’ll never be able to use the weather as an excuse for not walking the dog, you’ll also never have to smell wet dog when you get back in.
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20. Pet Gear Happy Trails Stroller

 

Pet Gear strollers specifically designed for smaller dogs. Lazy smaller dogs. It even has a built in bug net to keep away insects. Can you say puppy luxury?
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